The Anger Iceberg

When we feel “angry,” we often need to dig a little deeper to find out why we are angry to begin with. Anger is the clue that we have been hurt.

Anger comes from a sense of injustice-

that we have been wronged or violated in some way.

If we can tune into the anger with compassion and explore our pain through asking questions, we can often learn how we have been hurt and what our anger is trying to tell us.

You can ask yourself:

• When did I begin to feel angry?

• Which of the feelings do I have “under the surface?”

• How have I been hurt?

• What is my anger trying to tell me?

• What do I need to heal my pain so I can let go of the anger?

This image was created by The Gottman Institute. I do not own the rights to this image. For more information about this brilliant idea, you can read their blog post about it here: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-anger-iceberg/